On Emily's latest post, she mentioned abt GJJ as her dream Mr Right (I hope she can find this special Him soon) which made me recall a question that she popped while we were in the midst of k-ing till no voice, 'Gwen, 想再谈恋爱吗?' and also coincidently, Geannie posted #9 of her I Want list as 'I WANT Miss Gwen to find her Mr Right soon'...
To answer Em's question, I know it's been 3-4yrs since my last relationship and I should be seriously looking to settle down soon but my answer is still "No, I do not want" at the moment.. I don't have the courage or confidence to start again.. what if this so-called new Mr Right is the same as before? what if i get betrayed again? what if i can't take it again and do foolish things?what if i did foolish things and my parents get hurt?? a lot of 'what if' popped up everywhere like wild mushrooms after a heavy rain... I have lost faith and heart to commitment since.... I've met quite a number of men throughout these years from colleagues to friends' friends, all mr nice guys but somehow I can't find the right frequency..... 'no sparks' as what angie had labelled...
I know there a lot of my gfs out there who are worried that I'll be left on the shelf so they will try to intro every of their single possible male friends to me... ask me what type of men I like... I set my requirements high so that not every point can be fulfilled and there will be excuses why things won't work out.. Frankly speaking, I'm just tired of having to start and live in fear from the past...
I hope I can help fulfill Geannie's wish by next year but there will be no promises until I really meet that Mr Right... who is it? when will it be? Ask The One up there ba.. Or if anyone knows the answer, pls tell me... Meanwhile, I'm still enjoying my life as a single modern independent woman...
